D&E lead very interesting lives, and here you can get a hint of it, as they bitch talk about the events they live though.

April 2005 to June 2005

• Well right off the bat we were attacked by an air elemental that tried to kill everyone! It rippped up the room and almost killed Madison by choking her, luckily she had a flamethrower stashed away that she pulled out and used on it! But to no avail, thats when Daniel fainted and a crazy lady named Crustal apeared by climbing out of portal that apeared over Daniel and just wiped the floor with the elemental, grabbed him up and claimed he was her husband, then kidnapped us all and took us to the Ice Realm.
  And I get to tell you what happend due to OOC MAGIC!!! Crystal had put 'em all in a cage and said she was gonna kill 'em and I was gonna help! But when she woke me up I killed her instead! And freed everybody else then passed out. After some um... discussion! Everybody got out of the dungeon taking me with 'em. And as they were walking around the wierd fortress they were in they got attacked by Ice Elementals! They were kicking everybody's ass (...k not totally) till I woke up and made 'em go away in a flash. But sometihng was wrong with me! I wasn't uh... me!
  You were the you that was before you, the pre-reincarnation, you started to help us, then Crystal showed up again because she wasn't dead! Some OOC knowledge, it's near impossable to kill an elemental on their own plane. Then Daniel attacked her and they tumbled down some stairs, when we got there, Crystal was gone again and Daniel had changed into an 7 foot tall giant armored version of himself, but, he was mentally himself again! from there we tried to escape the huge castle we were in.
  Well I wans't really GIANT... I was all skinny still! We ended up escaping the castle and outside we figured out where we were for uh, real. It was very very cold and everybody woulda died if I didn't protect them from it see how useful I am! So I gotta feeling we should walk that way so we walked that way and came accross a very odd village that looked really creepy to me but normal to everybody else. We got swarmed by these odd things that looked like people 'cept not like people and they tried to take my power but I got away and we all got safe and sound in what we figured out was my old house there!
  The strange creatures wouldn't go into the house so we were safe, and after we all got a good long sleep, we got together and tried to plan what we were to do next, which ended up us sneaking back into the castle to try and find the pre-reincarnated Daniel's friend, to see if he could help us get back to Jade.
  The strange creatures wouldn't go into the house so we were safe, and after we all got a good long sleep, we got together and tried to plan what we were to do next, and during that discussion a woman showed up at the door and so we let her in, she called herself the warden and seemed to know where we should go, which ended up us sneaking back into the castle to try and find the pre-reincarnated Daniel's friend, to see if he could help us get back to Jade.
  We were all pretty confused about what was going on, even though we got some time to rest and all. Oh and at the house I was kinda like all powerful I could make and do ANYTHING it was cool. Anyway we went back in and got in a major battle with this Umbra guy but together we were able to defeat him and Crystal... again... SHE WOULDN'T GO AWAY and get to see this guy named Bernard. I was feeling really bad by this point and then I passed out again.
  Bernard helped Daniel wake up again but he did it in an amazing way he broke Daniel, the big Daniel, and inside him was our normal Daniel! The big Daniel was like an icey exoskeleton, thats when Pre-reincarnated Daniel woke up again and had a huge verbal fight with the Warden, who we found out her name was Randi, and we also found out she was his Daughter, after she stormed out, we all had questions to ask!
  Yah, so it was big story time. Everybody found out I was like a reincarnated ice elemental and had arranged to be born mortal cuz some really bad shit happend to uh... old me! Like he had a lover named Najwa who was a fire elemental and they had little baby Randi but then it all cocked up and she got killed and they tossed old me into some pit place... and then when he came out he seemed a bit um... off I guess! and eventually became ME! who is great. Oh and Crystal was just creepy and decided one day we were all married.
  Crystal also was the one that killed Najwa! And then we found out to help us escape we had to go kill Crystal so Daniel could be in charge of us or something like that, so Daniel used a fire elemental weapon that belonged to Najwa and shot Crystal with it... it was kinda easy to do since she was like all crying about Daniel not loving her.
  I'm glad I don't remember that part! But then it got wierd and Crystal's soul like uh... jerked my soul out and tried to run awway with it! They all went back to Bernard to figure out what the hell happend and he had to send Kayana after me. In there she was all tiny as it was like an etheral plane... or something. I gave her a buncha power to defeat Crystal, but at the end she acutally managed to talk to her and convience her to let everybody go! And then we all got sent back to Jade!
  Once we were all back we went back to the inn and found out we had spent 2 months in the Ice realm, well 2 months Jade time, and at the time Daniel was still passed out, but that night he woke up, while I was keeping an eye on him, and tried to cut off his ice hand! Which ended up with us having to take him to get stitches.
  Ohyah, we forgot to tell you about the ice hand. ... I have an ice hand now! I woke up all normal after that, so ALL IS WELL! And a bit about me is explained, though I think we're all activly trying not to think 'bout that shit. I wasn't the only one changed neither! Kaya got some scars from her fight with Crystal and Dolyn got like very minor ice power stuff! We think it gave Enks back his necromancy too! Poor Madison, all left out. Oh and Taya too, but she's Taya.
  Madison got her house! That counts for something! It's really cool, and our friend Sabrina got pregnant. and alot of pretty mundane stuff happened, Daniel cooked up a huge inscect feast for the celebration party. He used some insane spices on the food
  Thppt. Pussy tastebuds. And Me and Kaya are getting magical teaching from Cinette. It sucks. ... she also fixed Squeekers wings. Which is okay. I guess. I coulda done it.
  The last thing that happened is a big mystery, like a who-done-it, Eii killed her baby, and went nuts, we're all trying to figure out why. Anessa and I are going to do some necromantic spells.
  I got to spend a night in Jail trying to figure it out! Yah... its all sorts of odd crazy shit involving that damn bookstore. that I tried to burn down with my fire gun! ... and after I did that Randi came to yell at me about it. Ooops! We got to talk a bit too away from everybody else which was cool. Right now we're all gonna try to figure out this stuff about if Eii had a demon baby or a real baby and is nuts or what!
  Why didn't you tell me Randi showed up! I had some things I wanted to ask her. And how come I was the last to know about Eii?
  Well... I got busy! and oh look thats all the time we have for now!
  

Dec 2004 to March 2005

• Man. Too bad we didn't do this a couple days ago, Enker woulda had to do it all cuz I wasn't myself!
  True but your alter-ego did remeber what happened so he could have helped me do it instead.
  Ohyah... uh, we're getting a head of ourselves!! Okay first off we got attacked by another Golem thing in Seer's but we got rid of it for it could do nothing. Then we went back to Main Guard and no shit happend on the way!
  Yap it was completely trouble free, and when we got back to Mainguard Madison and Kayana got back from earth so it was a big reunion. Although they had some strangely bad news for us! Well for Daniel anyway.
  Yah, Wranda, that nut girl I dated for what, a week? Has gone INSANE and wants to kill every woman I know! Uh. I know I"m awesome, but I'm not THAT awesome! But nobody knows where she is so I'm not worrying about it! It was great to have Madison back I missed her SO FUCKING MUCH. And uh, Kaya too, I guess.
  It was great theat they came back when they did though, they helped us save Daniel's favourite strip club..
  The Butterfly club! Uh. It was complex but some shit was going on with it but we saved it! This stupid noble bitch thought there was some stuff buried under it that ther wasn't.
  Well technically it was but it wasn't able to be used any more.
  Some crap. And after it was saved uh... Enker spent a lot of time in the library!
  I was doing some research on some subjects that I was interested in, plus the librarian chick was cute.
  Oh oh and my seal broke again! So I had lots of fun with that!
  He froze up an entire alleyway.. Right before his mom came to visit.
  OH yaaaaaah... mom showed up. It was okay. ... oh okay it was kinda nice to see her. Kinda. I guess.
  You were soooooo worried about her showing up and kidnapping us too, and so was I.
  Yah! But she didn't!! And it turns out we know now why she couldn't find us, I got some time powers. I got the power to be all zen.
  You know I think your mom ment it as a way to explain it not literally.
  Zen zen zenny zen!
  :sighs: Well his mom went out for a night out with Kayana and the others, and that was the night Daniel's seal broke, so luckily there were no panicing girls around.
  A little ole snowball did it! But I was fiiiiiine.
  Yeah I know, anyhow Daniels mom went home after being invited to Kayana's wedding, and we are still here in Mainguard.
  And then Enker spent even MORE time in the library!!
  No I didn't! I went on a date! With Cinette to the mage-guild ball, we danced up in the air and had a really good time.
  I stayed in Main Guard and watched the pigs fly. And after that he was a bookworm with really old books.
  Where I got to see a picture of an elemental Ice god, well that's the best way to describe it. It had the same name as Daniel.
  LALALALA NOT LISTENING! oh and Rue talked to Anessa around this time...
  Sneaky bastard, and No One Told Me!
  And people tried to talk to me about what to do but I'm in denial! And the sky got really cloudy. And I worked on Squeekers' wings!
  Yeah Squeekers wings are really pretty, but unfortunately Daniel made a slight error in his calculations.
  I'm a dumbshit and his wings don't work so he can't fly!
  Squeekers was really depressed about it.
  And then the big storm that had been threatening for like EVER broke. And then stuff got scary. But we'll stop here cuz its not done being scary yet!
  Yep we're going to leave you on a cliffhanger, because even we don't know what's going to happen.
  

August to November 2004

• During our last chunk of life, Daniel's brother Vic reapeared from the future using that time-leaping power of his, and visited us again.
  Yah! And he wsn't all old like I was scared he was gonna be!
  He was older though and he's grown a fair bit since last time..
  He's taller then me now, so unfair. But I sorta figured it would happen. We had lots of fun, and he didn't even get ripped away at the end!
  Yeah he got to do a propper goodbye. Also, unfortunately, Tain has parted ways with us and went on with his ambition to become a great merchant, while the rest of us teleported to Seer's Hamlet, well attempted too, Nightsky had an adverse reaction to the magic that was used on her and nulified its effects, and was stranded in Naga, so Daniel teleported back to her.
  Yap! But before that happend, me and Nights did a great robbery thing! We stolded lots of gems. It was awesome! Ohoh, and I gave Squeekers superjump! But the little fucker was ungrateful and wants wings even more cuz he saw Vic. Then me and Nightsky tried to teleport a different way and it just dumped us out in the middle of fucking nowhere.
  And in the mean time, Taya, Dolyn and I got some rooms at the nearby inn, then went out for lunch, but while we were out we got attacked by a golem that tried to kill us! But it failed because Taya turned into a werelion and beat it to death with it's own arm!
  Man, I wish I coulda seen that. Me and Nightsky got attacked too, Nightsky totally killed the one going after us! Then it said some weird shit that makes me think somebody looked into my head...
  Same here, said some crap about thinking it knew us .. Then we met Polly a captain of the Seer's Hamlet guard. She took the vial of blood we found inside our golem.
  There was one in ours too, but we just left it there! Then after me not having any mental breakdowns at all, no siree, me and Nightsky got to Seer's! And there was a happy reunion!
  Yes where we got together and found out what everyone else had happen and then we went shopping and then Daniel and the others went to a show, I wanted to catch up on some reading.
  And then more shit hit the fan. It was some cool lightshow but thats not important-sides it had a real lack of boobs-I was leaning on the railing and it just fucking SNAPPED on me and down I fell! But this girl caught me and kept me from breaking into a buncha Daniel bits. And then she started crying...
  It seems a whole bunch of people had been killing themselves around her, and she thought Daniel was trying to do the same thing.
  Yah. And then this OTHER guy jumped down and DID off himself right there!
  Then she blamed Daniel for her not catching that one!
  I say its fate's fault. So we decided to help her out and figure out what the hell was going on.
  So we went to her place and did some sleuthing! By the way this girl is like Uber Rich. Her place is a huge ass mansion.
  Gonna get a reward~ Gonna get a rewaaaaard~
  We found out that it was a curse, the first one that commisted sucide was trying to get Vialan, the girl that saved Daniel, to love him forever, so right now the curse seems to be bringing him back from the dead, putting him into a faux body, and making him kill himself over and over again, trying to drive Vialan to suicide.
  But the guy didn't know it was gonna do that, we think he thought it was just some love spell. The moral of the story: don't fuck with magic if you arn't sure of what its gonna do!
  So after that I headed back to the Inn with Taya to gather our forces, we stopped at the guard house on the way and met with Polly.. and then when we got to the Inn Polly was already there.. and had been for a hour or more.. but .. Taya and I had been with her at Vialan's place and at the guard house, during the time she was with Daniel!
  Dunno whats up with that... and thats about where we left off! The mystery is... unsovled! oh and there was some stuff with Taya having a date who got attacked by some invisible guy.
  Yeah that was freaky and a little scary. We couldn't hurt the invisable guy, well we hurt him but it didn't seem to register.
  And I was drunk and could cast spells I don't know how to cast!
  He made it snow!
  Now if only I knew HOW I did it.
  Yap, well thats all of what we've done!
  Or at least all we're sober enough to remember.
  

May to August 2004

• Lets see... we gotta talk about... oh. Naga. Well. Lots happend in Naga. First off, its a little piss ant tiny fishing village. Hardly any shit in there. Tiny tiny.
  And when we got there we went off and explored ruins that we heard a mage guild guy ran off into, and thats when Daniel led us into a nearly fallen down house.
  Mistake number 72b. Once in there some wierd shit happend, and I just don't remember anything myself after I walked in. Though they said I said some stuff before I got zapped with some wierd mage guild stone.
  Which I grabbed and majorly burnt my hand, it was like melted bleeding skin time for me. And then chains of light came spewing out of the stone and attacked Daniel untill I threw my dagger at it and made it stop... Then a tidal wave hit.
  And I was faaaaaast asleep during all this! But due to the magic of OOC and retelling I can tell you what happend! Everybody hid in the basement of the inn as the wave washed over. And then these water girls attacked.
  They killed a few of the locals and Nightsky, Gwen, Taya and myself fought them off. Though most of us had the crap beat out of us by the end it.
  And then ummmm... I slept for a long time! And some old local woman talked about stuff that happend 75 years ago. and then.. I woke up!
  It was pretty much rest and recouperation time for us.
  Then Cinette showed up to try to spilt Gwen and her doppleganger! and it worked! ... except the doppleganger got shoved in the body of a recently dead GUY. Gwen decided to stay in Naga and the dopple was named Dolyn and was gonna leave with us! and of course we got chased out in the middle of the night.
  By a pitchfork and torch weilding mob of course, oh and my left hand healed up all weird, my pinky and ring finger healep joined together.
  And the guy that lead the mob was the same fuck who cut my hand off and we thought was dead. So we ran the hell out of town. We travled for a bit then ran into this Tain guy.
  Who at first we were going to rob then decided to be friends with instead. He turned out to be a merchant going to Tessa so we tagged along.
  Tagged along being the nice way of saying 'paid him pennies to take us there on his wagon'. He has an okay donkey named Burr too. It's not TOTALLY scared of me.
  I spent most of the journy in kitten mode. Also Taya got us attacked by insane chickens!!.
  Taya. Taya. Taya. She turned out to be a fricking were-lion and she acts like she does. I want Kaya to come back just to ditch her. ... lets talk about happier things! Me and Nightsky are dating!
  That was pretty good, you were smiling all the time, but she beat you to the 'tell people' part. We finally got to Tessa after a week of traveling, and went and booked into an Inn.
  And it took a damn week cuz Tain got us LOST. And then we got Taya drunk! And she's stupid she wants a knight on a white horse.
  Its not stupid to want something like that. Its just unrealistic, the only knight I knew that saved maidens in destress was just after a night in the sack.
  Ohoh! And I'm not the only one with pink hair anymore!
  Apparently Daniel was a chosen one of some description, he touched a cursed item, and when any one else touched it, the item gave them 'Danny traits'.
  We know pinkhair is first and horns second, but nothing besides that! Everybody has pink hair but Nightsky!
  We should get her in the night while she is sleeping.
  NO! And Dolyn and Tain have horns too! Then we went to a strip club after Tain INSISTED on getting a hat.
  It had a big pink feather in it. And the stripclub was excelent untill Ladies night started..
  I bought Enker and Tain lap dances. I thought they were gonna diiiiiie. Never figured Tain was gonna be so BASHFULL. I was thinking he was gonna try to smootch her.
  Well thats about it really, nothing else at all.
  I'm gonna give Squeekers super jump!
  Yeah other than that.. No brainworms this time for me... Yey!
  Maybe we should say a little more about Tain since he's a new guy! He's um... human! And right now has pink hair and horns mrehehehehhe!! He calls himself a merchant's prince and lives in Seer's Desert. NOT the hamlet, the desert itself. He's acutally an okay guy! I thought he was a bit of a stick of a mud at first, but I guess that sjust cuz we tried to rob him he acted like that. Some people.
  He's also supposed to be like a merchant prince! His parents have like a huge palace with dancing girls and everything.
  Which we might even get to see one day! Oh, and a new feature here. Pictures of the other people we're talking about! Starting now, I'm too fucking lazy to go back and talk more in the pervious ones. Here's Tain and More Tain! Now, later! See you next period of updating!!! Oh, and Madison and Kaya are doing okay in Earth-realm. Well, as well as anybody can do with out me being there to brighten the day!!
  

March and April 2004

• Again there have been massive gaps between actual RP movement, but we have perservered and continued on, I got my glasses and then the brainworms dragged us off on an adventure.
  Yap! Enker got his glasses and was just AMAZED at everything! He thought I looked wierd...er! And he was just walking around looking at EVERYfucking thing there was to look at.
  Well I hadn't seen anything that clear before it was amazing to see all the detail. You can't blame me for staring at everything.
  Then his headaches made him STEAL! I'm so proud of him!
  Well yeah, kinda picked something up without realizing it as I fell through a vendors stall.. well what ever it is, its the reason I was getting headaches.
  Daniel's eyes go all shiney,"So proud. So VERY proud! Soon I'll take him under my wing and treach him everything I know about stealing! He's obviously used this to tell me he wants to learn! And it turned out he stoled a key! That lead us to a dungeon under the city!"
  A trap filled dungeon that had pictures of demons and angels at war all over the walls. Daniel saved me from a big swinging blade trap!
  But it was magic so it sliced my cape up a little. I GUESS it was worth it. I GUESS.
  I don't know if it was worth it or not yet either, but it made my headache go away for now. Then we left town! And went further north.
  You left out a bit! Like how there were lots of traps and we all got by one of them! And that we got this wierd cylinder thingy.
  Oh yeah! You disarmed the swinging blade trap. Gwen and her shadow got the doorswitch we couldn't get too because it was on the other side of the door, and I got the cylinder... though you still picked up the wrong one afterwards.
  ... so then we went north!! And ran into this pretty lady named Nightsky. Who is like... an alternative line Madison! She's an elf and the only person out of all of us she knows in her world is me! So I get all her attention. MWAHAHAHHA.
  And she eats all our food, steals our stuff, and is really rude, also she's really weird, I am still reserving judgement on her.
  I like her a lot! So she hangs out with us, but not all the time. Oh and THEN we ran into this girl Taya who is a friend of Kayana! ... I don't like her. She's a fucking pussy.
  We had to pull her out of a well, and I like her, she is a nice caring person that just needs to loosen up a little.
  Squeekers makes me be nice to her. Meh. So we walked with her. And she was bitching and moaning and Squeekers is glaring at me so I stop now. And we got to a jungle!
  Uh we kinda missed a part between leaving the town and finding Taya. The giant trapdoor spider. *SHIVERS*
  I was trying to be NICE to you and not bring it up! But yah, Enker almost got eaten! This giant trap door spider showed up near a big lake and just popped up and tried to eat him. But he shifted to kitten and it didn't get him!
  It was like the size of an elephant... evil spiders... and yeah the rainforest that appeared from nowhere.
  We got to the jungle and were walking though it, seeing all SORTS of wierd animals, like snakes with 3 pairs of wings and the such. Then everybody else vanished!
  Actually Daniel vanished, the rest of us were fine. He walked a little ahead of us and dissapered. I had to comfort the girls while we looked for him.
  Then Enker appeared out of no where! And almost stabbed me!!
  Because he tackled me from behind, I thought he was a bandit or some weird brain eating creature. Then the girls apeared. Then we got out of the freaking weird forrest.
  I bet Gwen and the DG had to keep Taya from going all to bits.
  Probably, but she really isn't the adventuring type like we are, I hope we can get her to play her violin for us.
  She almost lost squeekers I hate her.
  You wouldn't have lost him, he would have mapped' the way back to camp. I'm sure if he was left alone for an hour or two he would have walked back to you.
  Something might have ate him! .... anyway, yah. And after the jungle Enker's BRAINWORMS acted up again and lead us to a spider kingdom!
  Where I passed out at the first opertunity that I had! And the spider people are lead by this hot looking Pirate queen!
  I touched her booby! After the girls went to go check out some other stuff... okay thats being polite. Taya is a chicken and didn't want to go so Gwen stayed with her to make her feel better. And yah! We met the hot hot hot HOT "pirate" queen person. Then Enker fell though a wall becuase of his brain worms and I dived after and saved him from whatever was going on!
  All I remember is tripping then opening my eyes and I was in this whole other room.. where Daniel hugged me and told me he was happy to see I was okay.. then after he groped the queen we were escorted to the city limmits where we went off and made camp ... thats about it isn't it?
  Yah. And um... I've been talking to Nightsky a lot... and we should reach Naga tomorrow... we're in a weird area with laying down trees.
  They are really interesting, I'm gonna ask about why they are like that in Naga.. Hopefully someone knows.
  ..yah.. so... guess thats it... next up... Naga!...
  I wonder if there are any naga's in Naga?
  

November 2003 to Feb 2004!

• Damn players, just LONGER and LONGER periods of time where we have to remember shit. Ummm... so we got back to Main Guard and back to the inn and ummm.... ohoh! I went out caving with this girl Wranda. Anything happen before that, Enks?
  Nothing that I can remember Daniel. I was mostly doing research and talking to the people from the Psycics guild while you were doing the sperlunking with Wranda.
  Yah. So, that was a bust. Sorta. Nothing was in the cave so we went to do research of our own. And though a long fucking goose chase we saw Bryan had gone FUCKING INSANE. LOONEY. WACKO. MENTAL. The room he was living in was a gateway to that horrid fucking thing connected to the bookstore. So it drove him batty and made him write shit about tearing out his eyes and all that crap. And of course he had gone out on a trip. I bet he's dead by now. I took Wranda back to the inn to like make her feel protected and shit and then investigated the thing with Anessa. Turned out to be fucking useless, as always. Oh and after that me and Wranda were a couple!!!!
  After that it was time to start planning the farewell party for Kayana and Madison right?
  Pretty much yah. And me and Wranda went out on a few date things. But she was being all fucking wierd about DON"T COME AROUND MY PLACE ITS DANGEROUS and I HAVE NOT TOLD MY FRIENDS ABOUT YOU so I was being all um.. what the fuck.
  I remember that, she was being really really weird. And around that time we met a new friend! Her name is Gwen, and she has a freaky shadow. She is a dancer.
  *laughs* That sounds like something out of a kid's coloring book. She's really really really cute too! Her shadow is her doppleganger given form and she's kinda twat but I like her.
  Yeah the shadow can be an ass sometimes, but at least it has a sense of humour, and Gwen can keep it under control when she wants too.. I think not long after we met Gwen we had the party, it was .. very interesting .. what I can remember of it.
  Nooooo more talking about meeting Gwen first! She tried to run away from us but I was persistant and followed her so now she's gonna stay with us! She's been alone since she got cursed, like three months.
  Heh it was funny when the shadow tried to strangle you, we had to convince Gwen we were weirder than her.
  She's still a bit 'umm... right..' about us, but we put up with her, so she can't leave! HAHAHAH! and she's really cute.
  To emphasize the point, yes Gwen is very very cute..
  Okay okay, so we got the party going on. And it was good! We had this dragon girl stripping!
  Daniel is purposefully mentally blocking out the fact he hired two male strippers for the party, and they hugged him alot.
  Didn't happen.
  See the power of selective memory in action. Though the dragon girl was very very hot, wearing kitty ears and a .. plug in tail.
  And she had big damn titties.
  She also liked sitting in my lap!
  This was when Enker was really drunk so he dont' remember no more. And oh yah, Kayana and Madison and Gwen had fun too. I guess. The doppleganger liked the Rhianna chick too. Whatever her damn name was.
  Yap at this point I passed out on the floor. I must say in my defence though .. I was drinking from Kayana's mugs.
  Then the party was over and we all went to sleep... oh and the next day ethier I got dumped by Wranda or I dumped her, its fucking confusing.
  All I can say is good riddance to a weird weird woman, after that we did a bit of shopping and planned our trip north.
  And said good bye to Madison and Kayana. Sniff. I wasn't as broken up by it as I thought I would be though...
  I think you might be a little over her.
  Or I just didn't wanna break down in front of Gwen. So, anyway, we left!
  And on our first day out we ran into some amature highway robbers!
  Kicked thier asses! Was really easy. Gwen's doppleganger is a good help in a fight!
  Without her assist we might have been limping back to MainGuard with an arrow wound.
  Maybe not THAT extreme... so we kept walking and for once nothing that fucked up happened before we reached Riverton! Besides running into a giant golen mole we couldn't shave.
  It had giant diamond claws!! Huuuuge! Too bad it was too cute to hunt.
  And its hair disapeered when you plucked it.
  That too .. and I bet it would have turned us into mincemeat ... fear the cute ones.
  Then we got to town. And did stuff. Enker has brain worms.
  Yeah its this weird headache ... it wont go away and it keeps moving, I plan on giving them to Daniel for his birthday. Oh and I am getting glasses. Not sunglasses actual glasses.
  The worms messed up his eyes!
  Stupid worms. Well thats about it really. No more untill next time.
  Enker is gonna pick up his glasses soon, then we head to Naga and destiny!!!!
  

Rest of September, October, and 1st half of November, 2003

• We left off the day before we left for the spings last time, this time we're starting off with our trip to the sprigs. After we woke up we went into town and opened the portal that lead off to the private resort, where it actually was we dont know but it was in the mountains, all four of us went and arrived there without any real problems.
  Well, the managers daughter showed up and told us about some ghost haunting the place, which made Anessa 'bout cream her panties then and there.
  That was cool, and her mom who was the manager came running down to yell at her for trying to scare us off, from there we went inside and got settled in and met a new person, a blind Druid named Gell.
  Yah. He's... blind alright. Oh yah. And has red hair. And a beard. For suuuure. So, we generally did our vacation crap there, but then Anessa got a hair up her ass and we went to check out this ghost shit, cuz well, I didn't want her wandering around and selling our souls off.
  Actually I went because ghost stories are fun at a hotspring, that and it seemed like something intersting to do, I also think Madison and Gell had the same reasoning as I did, we followed a ghost trail into a big cace up behind the hotspring.
  Well, that was my reasoning too. But it sounds COOLER my way. Ohoh! I ran around with no shoes on and cut my foot!
  He also was played with a crystal that was in the wall that made the whole cave reverberate with sound, and Anessa almost fell down a big hole when the floor gave way.
  I'm still bitter I didn't get that crystal. Oh and everybody saw little animals! I saw a mouse, Enker saw a fox, Anessa saw a cat, Gell... um.. didn't see.... an owl, and Madison saw something that scared the bleep outta her. And after we got accross the gap, we found a door! Past it was the totom pole!
  And up the totem pole Daniel did climb, up and up to look real close at the three different coloured gems that were floating around the top of the pole.
  And then I grabbed each one in turn!
  And then the lights went out!
  And my hand stopped working. So we left.
  After Daniel fell off the pole as he was climbing down. As we left there was a rainstorm that turned the cave into a waterslide type thing.
  So we raaaaan! back to the inn. And that was the end of that. Oh, and I weaseled out of Gell that he's not COMPLETLY blind, he can see like ... I think auras or some shit. But he can't see like normal people. Wonder what happend to him...
  Maybe we can find out? Also Daniel got a massage and .. Umm .. I got one and read a book ... and .. well it was a holiday.
  Mmmmmm massage. *waggles eyebrows* And I got falling down drunk the last night we were there from one fecking drink.
  Kayana had the same drink and was perfectly okay. While I stuck to sipping Brandy.
  She had like 34 of the same drink.
  I think Kayana hates her liver.
  Or she's trained it! So the next morning I was hung over a bit... not too bad though. And we left and went back to Main Guard!
  And then we went to look at Madison's house, that isn't finished, and decided that we would stay at the Diablo inn again, and thats it, no more.
  Hey, its my house too! Well, all ours. ANd yap. Thats it. Short for the time it took cuz of Icky Real Life Problems. See yah next... period of time to be determined!
  *waves* See you all next time.
  

The rest of August and a bit over half of September, 2003

• Okay well, we left off with us heading to see Ally... for what turned out to be the last time. We got there and she looked just like a younger version of Madison and after we talked a bit her and Madison went down into the crypt there to do what needed to be done... taking Valora outta Madison. So we waited a bit and got all worried and I actually fell asleep leaning against Kaya a bit, cuz as you remember, I had NOT been sleeping well.
  And after what felt like a couple of days, Madison emerged from Ally's crypt, but it wasn't Madison.. it was the person Madison used to be before she went and became a mortal.
  Well, I thought it was Sienna right away. She looked our age and all... guess Fae stop aging at whenever they want! And she was really nice and stuff... explained everything that we wanted to know. That Madison became a mortal cuz she wanted to loose the were bit of her, cuz her mom had a plan to totally destory everything using that bit. But becuase Sienna was here now it didn't work right.. she wasn't supposed to exsist again till Madison died.
  She told us about some things, like that Madison would be all like lost and scared when she woke up and that she would feel like a part of her was missing, and always would..
  Yah, cuz they were like the same soul in two places or something, which sucks, but its not that bad really. And then she left.. saying if things went well she'd never see us again. I sorta hope we do see her again... so its a win-win situation from my point of view. Cuase we can beat anything her mom tries to do!
  Yap its all good, no more crazy fecking fairies after our asses. So after Sienna left we went down and retreived our sleeping comrad and lugged her to the inn, where she proceeded to sleep even more.
  And I went to bed too. And had a good sleep! And hey, I just relized, I been getting excited and other stuff since then but not having cold attacks! So she slept a long time, and we did stuff to pass the time, like drawing and Enker went off and did stuff and things and Kaya stayed with Madison. And I gave Squeekers his new eyes finally!!!
  When madison finally did wake up, she acted completely crazy ... Okay she acted crazier than normal. She thought she was the captain of a starship and that we were all aliens.
  Hey, I wanna talk about Squeekers' new eyes!
  Well talk about them then!
  I gave him new eyes and they let him see color and they're all purple and he can close them! Now you talk about them.
  Uh ... They are almost the same colour as mine?
  Yah! And yah, Madison woke up a few times, but she was weird each time. But finally she woke up and she was fine! Almost. She don't remember ANYTHING to do with Faerie.
  Or anything that happened during the times faerie was involved, so every now and then its a little awkward when we have to explain what we are talking about when something in those times comes up.
  But overall its okay! So yey! And then we took a couple of days just to dick around town, we talked to Kaya's students and I sold art! Oh and I tracked down Bryan.
  And I organized a hotspring vacation for the four of us, so we could get away from it all. While we waited for the day to take the portal to the lodge where we were going to stay, we went and visited Kayana's class where she teaches people how to fight.
  Yah, and this girl Wranda there with two braids asked me to go explore some caves with her so I'm doing that when we get back! And I made money selling art!
  Yeah, Daniel set up a stall in the markets and Kayana was the hawker, lots of people came and bought art from him. I helped out by doing not much at all. A young kid tried to get Daniel to draw Kayana naked in an inconveinient pose that was funny, and then Daniel sketched a picture for three of Kayana's students that swung by.
  And then back to the inn afterwards! And Madison was playing bartender cuz she knocked the real bartender out cuz he was being a dickass. and Kaya drank this weird blue booze that made her sneeze fire!
  Heh, that was really amusing, she caught the bench on fire a few times. Daniel had a drink as pink as his hair, and I had some whisky. After that we all headed to bed.
  Mmm good drink. Then bed! And the next day we went to the hotsprings! But that'll be next update.
  So take care untill next time people!
  

2nd half of July and a tad of August, 2003

• Not much has happened in our world, so here is the update alademicro. After the big thing we got Eris ... and Wildfires was sleeping in one of the two beds in our room ... so Danny and I bunked up .. had a really good night sleep myself, but Danny woke up looking no better.
  Cuase the gods hate me. Kept waking up due to odd dreams... which you don't get to know about here! But I drug myself downstairs for breakfast. Where there was a bit of a fight as Madison wasn't too eger to go get Valora's essance out of her and give her to Ally. And I had weird... like cold attacks.
  Yeah, those were weird, so after a futile argument with Madison we went out for lunch to eat evil ducks. While we were at the restaurant we ran into Cinette again, she had two packages, one for Daniel and one for Madison.
  Well before that we went to talk to Ally 'bout what she was gonna do. She has plans to take over the court of winter and stuff. That seemed good to me! And she could sooooo tell what was going on with me, I know it. But of course couldn't come out and SAY it. Bleh. Then what Enker said happend! The package for Madison was something to do with a pendant she made for Kayana, and for me it was Squeekers' eye parts!! And then while talking to Squeekers about them I had another attack which Cinette saw. Foo. So she insisted on going and looking at me in the Ethereal Plane, whatever the hell that really is. So we went back to the inn to do that.
  Once we got there Cinette Daniel and myself all went into the Etherial plane, I tagged along to make sure nothing bad happened. Though when we got in there Cinette and I thought for a few seconds Daniel didn't come in with us... that is untill the ground moved under us. Daniel was huge like... Hill Giant huge.
  Mwahahah! Fear me puny mortal!!!! Yah. I was all big. Cuase I'm cool like that. And Enker was tiny. ... was also sorta chained up.
  He looked really uncomfortable too ... I would have ripped off those bonds .. if they wern't keeping him from going nova. At least we pulled off that mouth gag. After that Cinette did a scan on Daniel and found out what was wrong with him.
  Yah, the chains were like a representation of the seal on me. And she brought Kaya there to tell us what was going on, cuz Kaya wanted to go and I wanted to streamline things! Kayana was teenytinyitsybitsywitsy!!
  Yah she was so cute like that ... though she was kinda see-through. We found out Daniel's emotions were making the magic hurt him. Something about mages using elements too much and they are supposed to make you act in a certain way, but as usual if something says go left Daniel goes right, and pays the toll.
  Mreheheheheheheh. So yah, I was SUPPOSED to be less emotional.. but I ain't! So was having problems. But Cinette said it wasn't gonna hurt me. So yey! Then we went back to the real world and Cinette left and we went down to dinner! Where I proceeded to get very drunk after a bit.
  We both got drunk, it was a good night. Was nice and relaxing.
  Of course the night proper sucked. Again. I couldn't sleep.
  This time you woke me up .. cause you climbed into my bed. We talked a little and went back to sleep, then I woke up late and went downstairs for breakfast.
  Maybe YOU went back to sleep... so anyway I drug my ass downstairs and we had morning chitter. And Madison agreed to go to Ally, as well... better to regret something you DID do then something you DIDN'T so yah. So we're gonna go over there next. Hope it works out...
  So do I. Fingers crossed, only time will tell, well catch you all next time.
  

May, June, and the first half of July, 2003

• Woooooo... its been a while since we had to slave away here. Due to a few factors. Gally being too lazy to be arsed about the page, never ending TPs due to schedules from hell, and uhh, thats about it really. So lets see... this is gonna be short for the time it spans due to schedules! So lets see.... well, told you last time we found out Eris was loose in Main Guard and most of the stuff has been dealing with that! Ally did a thing so that Eris couldn't leave the city, so we knew she had to be here SOMEPLACE. But it was a bit of a time leeway. Oh! and I asked Cinette to get ingrediants for new eyes for Squeekers!
  Yap and Daniel went off on a little training sabatical while Kayana and I went around looking for information... we ended up going to a place called the Silver Anklet after a tip off, and well.. it cost us alot of money! And well since I got no information I decided to put the services I paid for to good use.
  Hey no, I wasn't gone while you did that! I was just staying back at the inn. And yes. Enker now has paid money for sex. HAHA!!!*point laugh*
  I paid for sex to get information you all needed so what if I actually got what I paid for.. Wasn't gonna waste all that money on nothing. *grins* Was good sex too, anyway tell people about your trip out on your own.
  You paid money for sex~~~~~~ I'm now better then you!! Oh, I went out and did stuff!! And trained and learned and stuff! Now I can do magic again, even with the fake hand! and I have feeling in my hand! LIke good feeling! ... feels sorta wierd where the armguard touches my arm though. Oh, and Cinette showed up with this guy Malachi while I was out there. She got REALLY creeped out too for some reason...
  After Daniel got back he proceeded to tease the crap out of a poor defenseless guy named Kiyrin, my stepbrother of sorts ... really hard to explain .. so I wont.
  Mrehehehe. So is how I was teasing him. So we'll move on. Ally told us Eris would try to take power, so we went to talk to Flerya, but that was a bust. Ohoh! And I had sex with Freya!!!!!! ... don't think I'll go back though... was nice, but I know me.
  Then Anessa and I went on a stakeout to try and watch the different customers, Anessa got hit on by an amourous dwarf and we took him off to question him and while Anessa did that I went and watched the front door some more.
  But that night was an overall bust! again! Oh and I was off to talking to Ally again while that was going on. Didn't find out too much more. Then we went back the next night!! And that night took about a month to RP out.
  *nods* Lots of stuff came up for people in RL. And lots of stuff happened ICly. So it all dragged out, but well on the second night Daniel came back with Anessa and I to stake out the Silver Anklet .. and well the people that own the place kind of spotted us watching the doors and sent us out some wine .. instead of taking the wine ... we went inside to talk to the lady that ran the place.
  And while we were up there, Anessa/Kayana smelt wildfires scent, so we headed off to talk to him. NOt that the stupid cunt told us that. And I went back to the inn and cried while Madison held me cuase Enker was mean.
  I didn't know about the crying thing... did some crying of my own after what Daniel said.. but found Wildfires in the dojo ... and we found out Eris had taken him over and we tryed to trap him in the staff .. Daniel showed up there when that happened..
  Yah, and I broke out the ice magic!!! Flung a shitload of spells (read: 2) around and eventually Anessa could beatbeatbeat him with the staff! and we thought we had him! So we ranranranranranran to Ally and she as like 'nooooooo, you didn't!' cus stupid Anessa forgot she said she would probably use an ice golem body. Which is what she did. So we ran back to the inn to tell Madison what was going on and to drop off Enker to keep watch there, and me and Anessa went back to the Silver Anklet. But i'll let Enker say more stuff first.
  I got a healing potion from ally which I took to heal up the wounds I go in the scuffle with Wildfires, and I was in hybrid form so Daniel could carry me .. at the inn I talked to Madison about some things and got a change of clothes because I hate walking around in blood soaked clothes.
  And now! what happend. Me and Anessa went back to the Silver Anklet to talk to Ariel, but she was busy fucking some paladin troll, we found out later it was cuase he and her were under a spell. So we went to check out the speical locked room on the 3rd floor. Well we got in eventually. I froze this dwarf guy who worked there before we relieaze I couldn't pick the lock. Well. I COULDA I just needed special tools I didn't have. So in we went! and... No Eris! Damnit. Thats where I got my face all brusised up too. Lots of freaky shit going on though. So we could tell she had been there. And we met this cute littel dragonhalf girl named Rhiannon there too, and she helped us more! She told us about the grotto, like an indoor bathouse. So we went there and after we fast talked our way inside... we found Wildfires there!! And there was a ... um. not really big fight... more like.. a slow fight. We got Eris in the staff, but only cuase Wildfires helped us at the end and made Eris touch the staff. Then I helped Anessa get to Ally and give Ally the staff! ANd Ally said to come back tomorrow. So we're gonna. Then we got back to the inn, and Rhiannon came with us, and helped get Wildfires in. Cuz Anessa's legs are all fucked up so I had to help her in.
  And thats pretty much it.. they staggered upstairs, Madison and I freaked and helped them get to bed and a healer... and well thats it untill next time I hope you enjoyed the show*G*.
  Yes. I sleep now. Zzzzzz.
  
  

April, 2003

• Well peoples Since the last time we talked, Daniel and Madison managed to threaten Raphiel's life and get themselves @booted from the place we were staying ... so we moved to an Inn because Madison's house isn't built yet.
  Not even sure really HOW that all went anymore... just that I wanted to blow his effing brains out. Tried to too! But missed cuase wasn't used to firing a gun. Oh well. Kayla got all pissy and kicked us out!! Only thing I'm gonna miss about that place is the bubble! So yap, now we're staying in the diablo! Then I went to get my new hand!
  It's a shiney new metal hand! It is a golem run prosthetic. My dad built it for him, so its got a few optional extras built in.
  Golem run prosthetic? ... I thought it ran on soul gems and was a guantlet! Oh yah, just found out about ONE OF THEM a couple of days ago! grr
  *chuckles* Yeah superstrength, bet you were really happy you wern't shaking after draining the snake.
  ...owie.
  It would have been a perminant sex change. Or enuitching. Hmm Next is something Daniel can explain better than me.
  You mean mean person you. Oh, we found out Madison's sexcrazyed loony sister is loose in Main Guard!! See, Ally enchanted a staff to catch her, but it didn't work! She got out some how!
  Yes and we've been chosen to go find out where she is hiding... So I'm searching the brothels while Danel raids the guardhouses..
  Yap! Thats the plan after I checked out all of the strip clubs and couldn't find her. The night I did that was the same night that Madison and Kayana went on a fancy date on a big fancy boat! But it got attacked by pirates!!!
  Oh thats the week I spent in bed suffering from allergies.
  Ooooooh.. yah.. it is! Poor Enker. He has badbad allergies this time of year here. So anyway! That night they got attacked by pirates! But I didn't know this, cuase I was checking out the strip clubs! Doing extensive research. And I kinda got REALLY EFFING DRUNK doing so. I stumbled into the backyard of the duplex and talked with Bryan a bit. He translated the stuff from the bookstore underground stuff. Then I wandered off and it all sorta fades out.. and I woke up the next morning in bed with a naked Madison!
  Whoa!! How the heck did that happen?! Did she tell you?
  She found me as a little drunk Daniel puddle in the hallway of the inn, so let me sleep in bed with her and Kayana, as I was too drunk to remember where our room was, hell. too drunk to even give her the key for our room. So no nookie. Sniff.
  Awwww no nookie for Daniel, he just gets to sleep in a bed with two hothot naked lesbian girls.
  Naw, only Madison was naked. and they're biseuxal! Not lesbian!! Umm... then... I dealt with my horrid horrid horrid hang over. Bleh. Later on went to see Bryan again! While sober! AMAZING! Saw him and found out there was like a tsunami in Naga 75 years ago... so yah. No usefull info! Then there was this unicorn..
  Crazy Unicorn ... Like insane in the brain make empaths quiver and say weird things crazy... she needs a hospital bad.
  You talk more I don't wanna. Oh look a shiny thing! *zips off*
  *blinks* Hey!! Uh ... well she wanted to kill Kayana and us for using a real unicorns horn for a costume Kaya wore once.. well we gave it back and this unicorn guy came and grabbed her and she turned into a unicorn fully and ran off. Thats .. about it ... So see you next month!
  *runs though!!* Yah, ran off! Got freaked at Madison and me for some reason!! Mmmmm Suger!!!!!
  Oh gods no!!! Someone get that offa him aaaaargh!!
  

March, 2003

• Well this month wasn't as adventure filled as last one, but it was fun! First off, I ordered my replacment hand. I decided to get one from Enk's Pop. Removable.
  Yes and I avoided seeing my father at all due to the want to keep the timeline strait and not somehow kill myself.. What a way to suicide.
  Yesyes mr. Angsty. So he took measurements and all and we got into a bit of a debate over Squeekers and that was that.
  Untill we went back to the Duplex.. and Land made me bite him ... the idiot.. and so I did .. and he turned into a fuzzy slavebot like anyone else I bite.
  Yah. But he was TAAAAALL... it was creepy! Then we played in the snow in the backyard and he flung me waaay over the town.
  I wasnt around when that happened, though when I found out I almost stabified the big git.
  Oh it alllll turned out okay! I fell though the roof of a dorm for a reform school for girls visiting from Tessa!!
  *steps back* This part is all his .. I refuse comment other than he was one hell of a lucky sonovabee yatch.
  *GRINS* Well. They ain't seen a guy in a loooooooong time... sooo... lets just say I got a major workout.
  *snerks* That and a fettish for schoolgirls.
  Oh yes. Oh very yes. Mmmmmm schoolgirls. And they had to sneak me out the next morning! So I dressed up like one of the graduated students. Yes. In a school girls out fit. Its suprising how little you care about cross dressing after a night like that.
  *laughs* Then you gave the outfit to Kayana, giving her and Madison a new game.
  Yah! And then.. My little brother showed up! That I didn't even know I had. He's 14 and from like 20 years after me and Enker ran off. He's covered in green fur, except for his right forearm, has wavey blond hair, big dragon like feet; but he can move them!, and white feathey wings. Oh and orange eyes. His name.. Viktor Rasputin Vavinchi. Mom hated him when he was born I think.
  I didn't run off I was *censored due to content that would incriminate Enkers Player* Dammit!! Heheh your brothers name really sucked... Maybe it was all those feathers that got her pissed off?
  Well, just called him Vic, so that wasn't that bad! Mrehehe, maybe! And he had teleportation powers! And he was great! He like idolized me!!
  *smiles* Glad someone in the future seems to care you aren't there too. That always makes you feel wanted.
  Yah!! So we had lots of fun! We played together and all sortsa stuff! He's alot like me. On and these little fluffy things like.. followed him or something.. turned me, Enker, and Kaya into 5 year olds! So Vic took us flying then! And then we eventually turned back... and I took Vic to a strip club!
  You forgot the part about getting shot down by over zealous amazonians Daniel.
  Oooooh. Ohyah! That was great! Squeekers turned out to be a booby touching device.
  *mutters* And an one of them spanked me for using words she couldn't understand.
  That's some people's fantasy yah know..
  It was mine too but it was ruined by the fact we wern't both naked and I was a five year old kid.
  Ooooo, good point that. So yah that happend. And I took Vic to the strip club and he had a really good time! Then we went back to the duplex and showed him a lesbian light show!
  And he bought you a really cool presant too!
  Oh yah!! Silk sheets, bright green, enchanted not to rip!
  Yes no more diving onto my bed saying its because my sheets aren't ripped!
  Awwwwww. Fridged!!
  You are soooooo gay.
  Am not!!
  Are too... Anyway what happened next?
  Well Cinette showed up with some odd stuff about like, whats going on with me. Just gave us clues about what to check out next. And then ... stupid mom..
  Yeah, well for those of you that dont get that statement, Vic got teleported home.. You see Daniel's mom found out he wasn't in his bedroom .. and teleported him back.. I think we blew our special effects budget on that one.
  Again. Stupid mom. Welp I'm off to sulk.
  *nods* And I'm off to get a shrink, this is so freaking weird.
  

Feburary, 2003

• Well hasn't this been an eventful month, it started off nice and calm... then we remembered Wildefires was missing.
  Hey! We didn't forget! We were just waiting for our cold iron weapons to get made! We killed time before that by me getting one hand friendly shoes and pants. And I rock at pool!
  *nods* Oh yeah, yes and Squeekers has beaten Daniel at pool a few times now! And a blacksmith girl was hitting on Daniel!
  ..she was? Whoa. Cool! Well anyway we got our weapons! and headed on out! (I got a full on the lips kiss from Madison before we left though!)
  I got Madison's Miss Magnum loaned to me.. And Kayana got a Madison Hair belt. Then we trecked on over to the waypoint thingy place. So we could get to the Fairy Realm.
  And I got some jack and a bit of sh!t. Ally said that I'd be cool in Faerie cuase I look like some waaay up important dude. We found more out about that later, so we'll tell you later!
  Heh, anyhow, when we arived we thought we were in the wrong world... Because it was like we were in a spaggeti western!.
  Yah! And our clothes all changed! I was like a bandit! and Enker was too I think... and Anessa looked like her and not Kayana!
  Yeah! And I got shot at by this meglomaniacal sherrif!! Just because I was trying to look at Miss Magnum! She was all strange!
  And he was gonna like arrest us or something.. but then somebody robbed the bank so we got away and went into this tavern!
  That like all westerns turned into a huge brawl scene. The cheating lady started it!
  Nooooooooo, you did! I kicked ass! And then some other stuff happend but it was really fast, but! We eventaully talked to the "cheating girl" named Charity Kinsella, and she told us to meet her at her hideout!
  *nodnods* And we found out she helped rob the bank, and that we WERE in Fairy, she had been stuck there for a really long time, and she decided to help us because we helped her.
  And we were gonna help get her out! So she took us to this place called the um.... something.... That trip sucked. Her horse kept trying to bolt away from me.
  And I found out I can transform any time I want in Fairy.. but other than that we went into this town that was more like Sodam and Gamora in western stylings to hunt for the Queen of winter.
  Nono. Not the Queen. Eris, the Princess of Snow. And so we went to this whorehouse called the Crystal Palace looking for her.
  Oh yeah. What we found was some drug-addicted looking whores and some asian lady that was a pain in the ass.. Untill we decided to go exploring by ourselves.
  So around we went! and once we got upstairs Eris like started to talk to Anessa in her head or some crap.
  And we started walking and then we were in this HUGE plain with nothing but lots and lots of black dust.
  Yap. So we just walked THAT WAY!! and eventually we got to this huge twisted icicle thing. With a bfb sitting outfront. Thats a big f*cking bear. All white too.
  When we tried to get past the BFB it talked and told us only Anessa could go past.
  So after some Drama Time in she went. And so we just talked to Charity for a while to kill time. Thats when I found out who it is that looks like me!
  Some Fairy god that has all the season Queens in a tizzy.. and the tower started falling down.
  Hey I wanted to talk about me more! He's called the Hornned God and I look like his little brother or something. okay NOW we may move on.
  I distracted the bear so Daniel could run into the tower and save Anessa, and got my ass stomped on by the bear for my efforts..
  And inside the tower it was freaky. There were these things like trying to eat my emotions and just basically cripple me mentally. Or something. But they couldn't keep both me and Anessa down so we got out! And she had Wildfires! We then ran out to fiiind- take it Enker!
  Me on my knees with my hands all shreaded after miss magnum blew up into peices in my hands, which hurt like all f*ck get out, While Charity shot at the BFB to distract it from me.
  Yap. So then we just hauled ass that way, as the tower was collapsing and being sucked into nothingness!
  Which was really really freaky ... so we jogged as fast as we could ... well Daniel Kayana and Kinsella did, I did the bleeding thing while Wildfires did the dead thing.
  Yeah.. he was really icky. He had no skin. Bleh. So he up and died. But Enker shifted to Hybrid and coudl HEAL! Wow!
  If that wasnt the shock of the century the next part is.. Tell them what happened when you tried to smash a teleport crystal.
  It smashed!! *10 second puase* Oh you want more? The Queen of Winter showed up too.
  *mutters something* Yes that! For that ruination of dramatic media you get to tell them what happened when she arived!
  Creepy shit I don't want to remember! What it boiled down to is she is crazycrazy. And brought Wildfires back to life, and sent us, and Charity, back to the gateway thing. (I'm still not sure why.)
  Me either, and then I went off to hire a wagon to get everyone home on.
  And to make a short story shorter, I got Freya who JUST woke up and she made Wildfires not die again. Then she fell asleep again.
  Then we used the wagon I got to go home in...
  And I ate alot of fish!! And while Anessa was watching over Wildfires we told Madison all that happend! And Squekers was soooooooooooooo happy to see me! And I think abit mad I left him too!
  Yap .. and thats about it .... Uh ... You can go away now!
  

Janurary, 2003

• Wellll... I'm sure you folks remember us talking about me throwing up and stuff in the last rant. Welllll I got worse. Feeling REALLY bad. Throwing up all the time. But I still didn't wanna go see a mage healer.
  Yes ... So Madison Kayana and I dragged him there, kicking and .. Okay moaning and complaining all the way.
  Yap. And we got there and the girl examined me and said I was dying becuase of the elemental based seal on me. And then Enker... what happend at the place I TOLD YOU I didn't wanna go? hmm?
  *rolls his eyes* Fine next time we'll let you die.. Again. So we were captured by the mage guild? It's not like we haven't been hunted by people before.
  Might notta died. I bet she was LYING. They capturd me, Enker, and Madison. But not Kaya. I guess they didn't want her! They put us on some fake trial thing. Stupid guild. They already found us guilty, we just got to argue out sentances.
  Again, like we haven't been in that situation before, Some fat asshole wanted to use me as a guinniepig for his studdies.. And Daniel was going to be spending time in jail.
  Or in servitude to the guild. Madison just got a fine. BUT then this Anasazi guy showed up... seemed familuar to me for some reason. He said the trial was a sham and it was all fake. And I thought things were gonna work out all great.. but then he cast a sleep spell on us!
  When we woke up I was in a cell with Madi and could see Daniel .. and then they were casting spells and this like portal started opening in Daniel's stomach and a girl poked her head out.
  I still officaly have NO EFFING CLUE what was going on with that. But they said they needed to break the other seal on me and put a new one on. Cuase.. um.. I didn't catch that... I think they told Madison and Enker.
  Because if they didn't Daniel was going to die orr loose his soul to the elemental plane. His magic was like a big flare in the sky making him a perfect target for things to turn him into a hole between the dimensions.
  ...well that sucks. Anyway they did that... and this Rue guy, Anasazi's nephew or something, was supposed to put me with Enker and Madison. But instead he took me to a room and.. CUT MY DAMN HAND OFF. YES YOU HEARD RIGHT FOLKS! I ONLY HAVE ONE HAND! NO MORE RIGHT HAND FOR ME!!!!!
  *mutters and nods* And after applieing a sedative to Daniel to stop him screaming, Kayana busted us out of the cell and I went after the fucker .. Kayana had told me she had knocked him out at the bottom of the stairs .. so I took Ms. Magnum and went and blew the guys hand off, and I was dragging up the stairs when I ran into the others comming back down.
  Kayana saved Squeekers!!! And she had this Cinette girl with her... mage chick who supposdly isn't a ass but I'm not so sure. Anasazi dealt with Rue and Cinette took us back to the duplex. Freya said she COULD fix my hand but... she did this super cool amazon healing thing but.. it didn't bring it back. Healed the rest of me up real good though. And now Freya gonna be asleep for a couple of weeks.
  Then Kayana got kidnapped and we went insane looking for her in a snowstorm ... and Madison got her ankle savaged by a silver bear trap...
  We hardly got time to rest! It was pretty lucky that got Madison. She healed up fast and silver ain't her weakness! I saved Kayana with this medallian blessed by some holy earth dude. The Fae were getting back at Anessa for not doing what they wanted her too. And they have Wildfires and are like torturing him. We're getting cold iron weapons made to get him back! We ain't sure what to do yet though, so we're just killing some time till we get a lead.
  Killing time includes reading, playing pool, and getting drunk.
  And me learning how to live with only one hand. Getting stuff modified. And stuff. Well.. till next time folks!
  *waves at the audience* Bye all!
  

December, 2002

• Allright allright.. There is a lot of this I don't understand.. it all is weird.. But well here goes, we went to the All Hallows Eve celebrations, and it all went to hell, one of Madison's sisters showed up and tried to kill everyone, it was a slaughter of innocents.
  Nono! First Madison's mother's knights showed up! THEY were the ones that killed everybody!
  Her sister was leading them!
  Yah, but we didn't see her first!! And you killed her! Yap! Enker killed the Fae princess of sleet, Valora!
  It was a hot dagger thrown into the base of her neck... I thought she was going to respawn.
  But nope! She's dead! Deaaad! Deeeeead!! And we had to go to Faerie-realm to save Madison! .. course we didn't do much there... but at the end Madison was back in her body and safe!!
  Yap!! And now its all in wind down for a few days.. Some weird stuff though... Anessa said she is in love with me...
  I don't know that ICly though. Cause Enker is a meanie and hasn't told me! and well okay we aint' RPed solo since then. But STILL! And Madison and Kaya had lots of lesbian sexxor! So Madison is all nice and free now! Cuase she had to pop her cherry with somebody that really loved her to be free!
  Uh huh lots and lots of sexxor is good for yah!
  And.. There some stuff with this bard girl named Sable, but I don't really understand that so no talk about it here! uh... I been getting sickish.
  Yeah and he was not gonna go to a healer but I made him go!!
  Yah, our live in Dr. Freya the Amazon!! She's six and a half feet of goooood looking woman in skimpy armor most of the time!
  And wants me dead!
  Naw, she just don't wanna deal with you.
  *shrugs* What else? Ummmm The new house is almost finished!
  So you say. Nobody else seen it!!
  Neither have I ... Dwarves told me it was almost ready!
  Uhoh... you knoew with Dwarves.. almost ready could mean they just pored the foundation.
  That or they are having trouble getting their artisians out of the house because they keep going back in to finish their carvings.
  We shall check it out soon and report back. I think we covered everything... so next month people!
  Take care and happy new year!
  

November, 2002

• No rant this month due to TP gremlins.

September-October, 2002

• Wow its been a while. Damn Gally's evil school making us miss the september ranting!
  *nods* Yeah evil educational mind wiping, ruining our chances to speak foul of evil occurences.
  Yap.. so lets see.. last we got to...Kayla's sister showed up. What happend to us next?
  Ummmmm we went to the Builder's Guild.. and they were like helpful and stuff in getting Madison's House started and stuff.
  Our house!! ..ooohooh but before that I modified Squeekers!!!
  Oh yeah and he can now move on slippery surfaces.
  Yap! I gave him nice leather pads on his paws! He can grip really good now! I'm still semi-amazed I didn't f*ck him up.
  ONah you read that book and learnt stuff before you tried..
  MIGHT do his eyes next. Oh and there was some stupid sh*t with Kayla and the mage guild.
  I wasn't there for that you get to explain!
  Thppth. Well it was all f*cked up. They were like saying she couldn't be an arch no more. A GOOD THING. Nobody that retarded needs that much offical power. They all cuntrags anyway. I was acting like a total git and they didn't do anything to me. I MOONED the fricking people and they just sorta blinked. LAME!
  *snerks* Gaylords! Archmages, I suddenly have a new idea about what that stands for.. But I'm not gonna tell you.
  Good cuase we arn't cleared for adult content. Hm... next. We found out Madison wasn't in her real body, she was in some ice golem body! And Anessa showed she's just a power hungry bitch and betrayed her. But becuase she wasn't in her real body it didn't go bad.
  Booyah! But her ice golem body died, and now she has anouther body, one that looks exactly like Kayana, and is a hologram.
  I helped her get into that!!! I saved her soul and helped her!!! Well her sister Alethea told me how...but still!!!
  Yah! And uh ... whats next ummmmmm...
  My seal broke.
  Thats right, the pink haired walking antartic circle.
  I got all like emotionally overloaded and BOOM it broke and... yah there's been problems. Tell them about them Enker!!!
  If he stays in a room too long he turns it into a deep freeze, everything he touches gets covered in ice, he has these like insta reaction things happening.
  ...insta reaction things?
  Yah your ice buckler thingy.
  Ohyah! Thats was cool! Took a while to figure out how to make it bugger off. But I'm like totally immune to cold so its okay.
  But I'm not so seperate rooms untill you stop freezing the air and stuff.
  Meh. Hmm... what else... Land dropped in though the roof sometime in all that. But he's wandered off someplace again.
  He seems to be okay though so yeah.
  And... oh! The festival!!!
  Halloween kicks ass!
  Shhh. Its the Autuam festival. NOT Halloween! I'm a demon, Kaya is a unicorn, and Enker is a paladin! But there was this Ghost. ... well I think it was a ghost! Killing people!
  Dointg it messy like too! Evil creature, and it almost got us as well.
  Yah. I still not sure what all that in the basement of the bookstore was about... ah well. .. we get everything, Enks?
  Yeah I think that wraps it up.
  See yah next month! (Hopefully)
  Later all! Hah!.
  

August, 2002

• And we're back again! Well lets see, Enker got a hold of his empathy thanks to the great! the fabulous! Then magnificant! the just plain perfect, Me!!
  *chuckles* Score one for the Dannymeister. Oh and on other news, Fairies Suck Ass!! Evil lil s**teatinggmotherf****rs!
  Yes. VERY VERY YES. ... long story short, they took us and a couple of the people we were with off to 'play' with.
  For us it felt like we were there a week .. but in reality it was like five minutes.
  Yah, that was kinda neat. Then we joined back up with Madison and hit the road back to Main Guard! and we got there with no problem!
  Then we found out Kayana was all messed up mentaly, and we went hunting for people to help her.
  And we found them with no real problem, and the psycic lady got Kayana out and all better! Then her and Madison went off to have lesbian sex I think!
  You know, now I think about it, Harlan had plenty of time to go get someone like that. Oh then some highelf guy tried to pick a fight with me, so I defended myself after he whacked a defenseless Madi!
  Note how he leaves out it was his smart mouth that cuased it. Anyway he killed him! Pretty easy to, diplomates can't fucking fight.
  Then something really weird happened that made Daniels fragile little mind snap.
  ...lets not get into that.
  Yes because it was strange andweird so we say it was just some freek multiverse occurance that has nothing at all to do with us.
  I'm going for mass hallucination.
  Yes, that works too.
  Lets see, what else... Kayla has a half sister all of the sudden and she's shown up.
  She is also a religion nut.
  Yap. Bleh. I'm tryin` to give her a little more time but.. DAMN. She's too... something. Eh more on her next time, one meeting isn't enough to get a good feel for somebody. She could justa been all nervous!
  Oh gee around us? How could anyone be nervous around us?
  Mrehehehehehhehehehheeh. I did lick her!
  *Snerks!* Hehehehehahaha!
  ... I still gotta get my kiss Madison promised me for that!
  Then go get it flash!
  Next time I see her! Well thats all that happend to us this month! Pretty quite month!
  I'm gonna go catch a nap!
  Till next month! .. hope we're still alive then.
  

July, 2002

• Where to start? Where to start?
  Well... I think we're not supposed to go too far back. So. Lets bitch about the f*cking guild! Goddamn guild! The goddamn magic guild! We got chased out of Seer's hamlet cuase of Squeekers! Cuase they're f*cking morons!
  Gealous gold grubbing greedy evil f*ckers. All they want is someone to pick on .. I still cant remember that fight propperly. They really tried to f*ck us up good.
  I can! These three guards came after us as we were leaving, I mean think about that. AS WE WERE LEAVING. Squeeker's isn't illegal out of the hamlet! JFIOSFJOIWJRIOWJFOSJFSFRRAAAAAAGH!!! ... ahem. So three guards. I froze one, Madison was trying dipolomacy and fast talking but it wasn't working, and then you went f*cking apesh*t and bitebitebite!!
  *blinks* You sure? That would like really do some really badbad things to those guards if they aren't were's. Hehehehe lil 3 feet tall fuzzy slaves."
  Oh keep laughing funny man. cuase thats just what happend! You bit the other two and hell then it was easy to run away from them as they were a) buried in thier armor and b) mindless lil slaves! But we're a couple days out now and nothing's come of it so we should be okay.
  And hopefully those two guards are back to normal again.
  Well it took me about a week so eh. Lets rant about your empathy now!!!
  Oh here's a new way to send me completely buttfsck inane! Lets make the necromance be able to now feel the intense personal feelings of all the people around hm in a 6 foot radius!! Gods dammit!
  He's just like that cuase he's amazed how many hours of the day I'm very horny.
  Like hell. I already knew that .. I'm amazed how often you actually releive yourself from the horniness in a day.
  He's lying. The first part blew his little mind. Read your f*cking book and get your sheilds up already!
  That book is like trying to read one of your moms notebooks!
  Read faster! Well anyway, currently we're on the road, hoping the guard won't follow us and that Enker can learn something before he goes insane. Catch you next month with the latest horrid happenings!
  And if I go insane I get out of doing any work! Yay! What the hell am I reading for .. Catch you next month people!